Kevin Bae

Non-Social in a Socially Networked World

Micro aggression bullshit

This opinion piece in The Atlanta Journal really frosts my ass. It’s called, “What fuels anti-Asian hate”. This Asian woman needs some therapy. She is finding insult and racism in absolutely everything. If I were 100% white and knew her personally I would shun her immediately and refuse to associate with her. She racist against white people. Here’s her taking offense to absolutely nothing.

Let me share a very ordinary example of racial gaslighting. A few weeks ago, I was venting to a couple friends. I told them how someone had said an anti-Asian slur and “shut up, bitch” while I was speaking in a Zoom webinar the day before. Then, I recounted an incident when I had shared a sticky rice dessert with a medical school classmate, who then said, “the inside is great, but the outside is like snot.” I told my friends how since then, I could not help but wish that classmate ill.

It was a classic example of a person of color experiencing a microaggression and venting to her friends about it – except it led to (what I only later realized was) racial gaslighting.

One of my friends cut me off and said, “don’t you think you’re being passive-aggressive? He said it was like snot, not ‘it was snot.’”

He wasn’t being ironic. He was taking a moral high ground – first, dismissing the comment and breezing over how it was a micro-aggression, and second, saying that I was being passive-aggressive.

Nut bag Jennifer Y. Tu on

Yes. You are being passive-aggressive. You are unable to have a civilized conversation about a stupid dessert and allow other people to have an opinion about it. Talk about making up issues to get angry about.

Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay